Shades of Gray

Uganda Day 32

Yesterday, a very special person shared a Psalm with me, and I just wanted to share some of it...

Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD;
let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.
Let us come before him with thanksgiving
and extol him with music and song.
For the LORD is the great God,
the great King above all gods.
In his hand are the depths of the earth,
and the mountain peaks belong to him.
The sea is his, for he made it,
and his hands formed the dry land
-Psalm 95:1-5

Sing for joy to the Lord. What does that mean? Its been a trying morning just the kind that is one thing on top of another, things that normally would roll off my back, but today compounded and shook me pretty good. Tuesday at Salama, was beautiful. And I really will get around to sharing that I promise, but somethings need more processing...Wednesday was a really good day. Us, MEs got breakfast at our coordinator, Rachel's house. It was awesome to 'food' and fellowship. Then after a series of classes, Worldviews,History, I went to meet with the other MEs for our practicum class. We had a wonderful afternoon talking about our home stays. It was so good to hear that others were still struggling with the things I had been convinced I was the only one dealing with. It was almost like group therapy, and I really needed it.

Thursday started with a the aforementioned encouragement, and ended on a sour note. I experienced the truth in 'African Time' yesterday afternoon. I have a 4-6 tutorial for my worldviews class, which basically means I am the one American who gets asks the awkward 'American Worldview' questions (seriously, I am not really sure you can even call the mash of beliefs and thoughts in America one worldview), which is actually kind of entertaining at times...but its the last class of the day and I'm usually hot and sweaty and just ready for the day to be over. Lacey and I are required to be at our homestays at 7, ie. before it gets dark, and in order to do that comfortably we usually leave around 6:15. In theory, a class ending at 6 should give us plenty of time to change shoes and check email one last time and head out. But that would require the class actually ENDING at 6. I was pretty shaken up when at 6:15 she looked at her watch and just kept plowing through the questions. It was like ok, I really need to leave, but she kept talking about this assignment and there are only two assignments over the course of the semester, the class meets once a week, and I really do not know-know anyone in the class. So clearly, I had to stay and wait it out..At 6:20, Lacey texted me. Then at 6:30, she starts dividing us up into groups for this project and the way the room is set up does not really offer an easy counting off so people couldn't count themselves off. So I suggested she just go down the attendance sheet, which she ended up doing, but then we had to exchange numbers with our groups...So finally, at 6:40, I'm pretty worried/confused/frustrated and I find Lacey waiting for me with all my stuff packed up, but at this point there is no way we will make it home at 7. So after a few frazzled phone calls, we ended up with an escort. So frustrated and agitated, I arrived home to my mom saying, 'You are late'. Yes, yes, I am aware. And on top of that there was homework that needed to be done...I went to bed before that was done.

This morning God reminded me of the things that I had successfully thought I'd forgotten over the summer.It is amazing to me how bright and blunt things can seem when you haven't seen them in a while. I love how he lets me think I have avoided the problem by conveniently shoving it under the rug, but it is all to easily drug back out. This morning was one of realization and a few tears. Thankfully, the Lord also provided me comfort this morning and the gift of love and words from just the people I needed to hear from. He is so good. And he loves us even through our stupidity. He truly is the greatest provider. Pray that God will provide me with answers or at least peace, and I will pray without bias for resolution.

Totally off topic, but I question for you all. Do you think that your knowledge of God is completely correct? If not, in order to worship correctly is there a percentage of your doctrinal thought that needs to be correct? If not, then do all people in their worship of Allah, or various other gods worship God in their desire to worship this concept of God worship the true, living God?
This is not a rhetorical question.